Tag Archives: milspouse

Milspouse Friday Fill-in #39 – Separations and Children’s Names

1. Have you and your spouse agreed to live in separate locations (a geographical bachelor tour) knowing that the short-term inconvenience would have long-term benefits for your family? How did it work for you? submitted by When Good People Get Together

Well, we haven’t had this opportunity, and I’m glad. I can see it being considered if there was a significant short-term career advancement opportunity. Say, further education elsewhere or a short-term internship (or TDY’s with the military). Benefits? Hmmm…possibly a savings with finance, possibly not. Also, it could allow for opportunities that wouldn’t be possible otherwise.

2. What is your favorite thing about being a MilSpouse? submitted by Sarah Ruth Today

Hmm . . . well I love how hubby looks in the uniform 🙂 and the extra drill pay is appreciated. I love being part of the military community (at least online, I don’t live near a base) and have appreciated the contacts I’ve made and the inspiration and encouragement that others have given me. I also think that, being part of the military community gives you a somewhat different perspective on things. You don’t take a lot of things for granted.

3. If you could still have your spouse/significant other and your family, but take the military life out of it…would you?  submitted by Trust. Love. Believe. Bake.

Mixed emotions. The National Guard, in some ways, can be more of an inconvenience and less of an actual job and lifestyle (like I believe it is for many active duty families), so in that sense, yes, I would like to have the inconvenience part gone. However, I’m proud that my husband is in the military . . . 🙂

4. What have your homecoming experiences been like after a year long tour of separation? submitted by Army Soldier, Army Wife

We haven’t been separated for any longer than a month, and that was before we were married; we’re pretty new to the military. After a month separation, the reunion was very sweet. Like I’ve heard many say, the first couple days (or weeks) are like a honeymoon, you’re so happy to see each other again. 🙂 After that, you settle into readjusting and realizing that you both went through things while apart that the other didn’t really share in.

5. If you have a child(ren) why you chose their name(s)? If not, why you would name your child something?  submitted by Tiara’s & ACU’s

Hmm . . . my number one criteria is that both hubby and I like the name(s). After that, I want it to be one that society won’t think is strange. I don’t want our children walking around with names that make people do a double-take. Other than that, I don’t know. I keep trying out names in my mind, and may have some tentatively picked out, but nothing definite yet. I guess, in some ways, romantic that I am, I want to give my children names that stand for something too (like they did in the Bible), but that can get a little tricky. Perhaps, I’ll give my children good and proper names and then give them nicknames with meanings (nice nicknames, that is). 🙂

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Filed under Marriage, National Guard Life, This Earthly Walk

Mil-Spouse Friday Fill-in! 5 Questions

Head on over to Wife of a Sailor to join in!

1. What is your favorite MilSpouse blog (not including Wife of a Sailor who we all love, or your own)? submitted by Our Crazy Life

Umm…I’ve got a lot that I keep up with as best I can. But, one of my favorites has been Army Wife 101. Right now she’s gearing up for a PCS, but before, she had shared a lot of helpful and interesting information for military families. She’s real on her blog and makes you feel like you’re a part of the family.

2. What are your favorite perks about your s/o being deployed (we all know there are perks)? submitted by Ramblings of a Marine Wife

My husband hasn’t deployed yet. We had two different training/testing month long times that my husband (at that time boyfriend and fiance) was away for. It’s definitely not the same as a deployment, but they are the only times we’ve been separated, so I thought I’d mention them instead. There was very little communication between us during those months (the army’s like that sometimes). To be honest, I can’t really think of too many highlights for those. I missed him a lot and tried to keep busy. On the first one, I really dug into my relationship with God for that month, and that was amazing. On the second one, I enjoyed getting to know some other military gals online, and had my first experience of picking my loved one up at the airport when he came back! 🙂

3. How long did you date your <significant other> before getting engaged? Married? submitted by Utterly Chaotic
I believe we dated (courted) for about 2.5 years. It was a long time, but we made the most of it, while he finished undergrad. We got engaged about 9 months before we were married. Since he was in ROTC and going into the National Guard, we were able to have a wonderfully planned wedding. Not the usual mil-wife wedding story, I know, so I’m especially thankful for that. 🙂

4. What do you think your <significant other> would do if s/he wasn’t in the military? submitted by Adventures of M-Squared


Hmm, we’ll he’s in grad school for environmental engineering now, so that’s what he would be doing. He would also like to be more involved with church and serving others. He’s a pretty service minded guy. Something I love about him. 🙂

5. If you could talk to the Secretary of (fill in your appropriate branch) what is one suggestion you would like to bring to their attention in order to improve the lives of military families?  submitted by My Life as His (Air Force) Wife
To be honest, I’m not sure. I haven’t been a mil-spouse long enough to figure it out. I think maybe they could do a little more for National Guard wives, at least with my husband’s unit. We’ve been there almost three months now, and I have had no communication from anyone. Which is okay (I’m not complaining, just wondering how to change it). I don’t mind taking the initiative, but I’m not sure who to even talk too, or if there is an FRG or who I would contact if there isn’t an FRG. It’s kinda confusing and a little frustrating, but I know that’s how it can be in the National Guard. So, just taking things slowly. At least there isn’t a deployment coming up too quickly in the future, so I still have some time to figure things out.

Well, there you have it! Why not leave me a comment, or run on over to Wife of a Sailor and join in the fun (but, leave me a comment first). 🙂

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Filed under National Guard Life, This Earthly Walk

My Guest Post at Wives of Faith Website – Feeling Beautiful?

I just wanted to share with all of you a link to a post I  sent to Wives of Faith, a website dedicated to encouraging and connecting with military wives. I’ve found a lot of encouragement there for myself and my marriage. They posted my article today, and I wanted to pass it on to everyone who stops by my blog. It was a delight to write for them.

God bless!

But I Don’t Feel Beautiful Today

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Filed under This Earthly Walk

Military Communication: Creativity and Flexibility While Apart


This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic License.

Communication can be difficult for any married couple. But even more so, when a couple is apart, on different continents and different timezones. The military lifestyle (deployments, temporary duty assignments, annual training, workups prior to deployment, etc.) brings unique challenges to communication. But today’s technology means that creative and ongoing communication can and does happen.

There are two words that seem to describe military wives best, flexibility (“Oh yes dear, our plans are changing again? We’re moving where? Why not!”) and creativity (“Hmm…who says it can’t be done? I just did it, didn’t I?).

Flexibility

– There are times when regular communication does not happen due to the military job.

(Don’t be afraid to talk about what you would like, when you get the chance, or even prior to his leaving. “Can I hope for a phonecall a week, honey?” “Will two weeks be enough time for you to settle in and call?” Going over communication expectations and possibilities will help both husband and wife. )

– Often times phonecalls are interrupted.

(Some advice I’ve heard is, start your phonecall out with “I love you” in case you get cut off, then at least you’ve taken care of the most important part first. Also, jot down “must talk about” items on a notebook so you won’t forget them when your honey calls and you’re terribly excited to hear his voice. This also gives you something to talk about if things are at first a bit awkward for you both over the phone.)

Creativity

– Don’t be afraid to be creative.

(One wife wouldn’t settle for not being able to send her husband a cake. Usually cakes cannot be sent because they don’t last well through shipping. She chose to make her husband a cake in a jar. It worked out beautifully, and he enjoyed it! Many wives send  a “holiday in a box”. With these, the spouse fills a box full of items special to the holiday or event, including birthdays or anniversaries too. For instance, for Valentines Day, a box full of heart candies, chocolate or other special treats, as well as delightful cards and even a picture album are sent.)

Here is a link from a fellow milspouse blogger with her package idea! Throwing a Surprise Birthday Party from A Thousand Miles Away

– With the length of the present conflict, many improvements in communication options have been developed. Don’t be afraid to tap into these.

(Gone are the days of letterwriting only!)

So, here are a few creative communication options.

#1 – Low Cost Ways to Connect During Deployment

I just heard about Spawar calls.

#2 – Spawar Free Call Days 2011

Spaware.net

And here’s something for children!

Daddy Boxes

CIVILIANS

(Offer to help send a package or a letter to the deployed soldier. Or why not send a “deployment package” to the spouse herself. Include a book or video, small items to pamper herself with, crafting supplies, or other things you know she needs (you can even ask her), a phone card, or money for postage or shipping. Why not get creative yourself! I can’t begin to tell you how blessed you will make her feel.)

I would love to hear more ideas, both from military spouses and civilians. What have you done or are planning on doing? Any unique situations you have experienced? Please share! If you leave me a link sharing a post describing a package or idea you have done, I’ll include it here!

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Filed under Marriage, National Guard Life, Social Media

MilSpouse community: 5 answers about me!

I’m new to the milspouse community, but kept running across this Friday Fill-in on all the blogs I was visiting, so I had to join in!

 

1. What do you usually want to know about someone when meeting them for the first time?

Actually, right now, I think what I most wonder about is what they are dealing with in their life. It seems that almost everyone is struggling or needing encouragement in some area; I want to be able to pray for and reach out to them, and encourage them. (I know, I know, that’s pretty deep for a first time meeting, but I tend to be the kind of girl that just wants to get down to business. Spare me the small-talk. Though I’ll make a valiant attempt if you want small talk.)

2. Would you rather know everything about your spouse, or be regularly surprised?

I like knowing everything. At the same time, people are continually changing (and I’m newly married), so my hubby is often surprising me too (in a good way :)).

3. If you could live in one city for the rest of your life, where would you live?

I really like where I live now, but I would like to visit other places too. I’m not ready to settle down forever in one place yet.

4. When you go out of town, what one material thing do you ALWAYS take?

My keys and my phone. 🙂 Beyond that, the item is ever changing. I often will take a book to read or a notebook or journal to write in. I find that having something I can escape away into if life gets to be too much is comforting.

5. Using no more than 10 nouns, and ONLY nouns, describe yourself.

Perfectionist. Closet extrovert. Military Wife. Beginning Homemaker. Christian. Serious-minded Thinker.

Alright, I’m off to make my first attempt at baking an Angel Food Cake!

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Filed under Marriage